So here’s some more academic humour. Everyone loves it when higher education panders to the young crowd, right?
Part of this strip, of course, was really wishful thinking on my part. I was taking Canadian history at the time, and the course almost killed me with intense boredom. Canadian history is, perhaps, the most boring history course you can possibly take. Period. End of sentence. And I like history. I’m a qualified high school history teacher, for crying out loud.
Let’s put it this way: take any equivalent, notable event from American history and it will always be inherently more interesting than the Canadian one. The Americans wanted to form their own country? They fought the freakin’ War of Independence! Canadians want to form their own country? They politely asked Britain, and Britain said yes, because they never really wanted to own Canada anyway. See what I mean?
I desperately, desperately would have loved to see my boring, monotone professor flown in on wires with an accompanying laser show.
Meh. Go read “Hark, a vagrant”.
Kate Beaton makes Canadian history marginally more awesome.
Plus I know Halifax, Nova Scotia moderately well. Spent a lot of time there. So there were all these hilarious moments where I was reading the commentary and thinking “Hey, I was there!” …
(For the record, while I was there, I was seeing a lot of Canadian history on the television and wondering what the whole obsession was with it).
Kate Beaton rocks, but Canadian history still sucks. Canada is still trying to justify its existence as a country. That’s what the whole obsession is about. It’s a desperate attempt to gain some sort of legitimacy. It doesn’t work.
Canada made great contributions in World War 2. Even though they are largely forgotten, Canada was one of the biggest Western suppliers of resources, and the biggest in shipping in the Atlantic. The most successful landings on D-Day were Canadian. Canadian troops were still fighting in the Pacific alongside the U.S. well after the Brits. I’m American and I approve this message. Rant over.
You’re right, actually. There are many points of pride in Canadian history, but most of the ones that don’t center on WWI or WWII are … incredibly boring. There are a few flashes of interest, but being Canadian, we’re kind of suspicious of the interesting parts so they usually get glossed over in favour of more boredom.
Wait…, y’all ain’t just the fifty-first state?! Hell, learn something new everyday.
If we are, then we’re the best state y’all’ve ever seen.
yesssssss, keep underestimating canada we like it that way….
lol ok creepy phase over. not gonna start an argument over canada`s history i`m still proud to be canadian and i believe our historical points are different than the states but in the end its all the PAST.
I’m Canadian. And boy, is Canada boring. It’s one of the best countries in the world, certainly, but … BORING. (I happen to like boring when it comes to countries.)
Back in my college days, shortly after I left the army, we used to go to Windser, Ontario to get our beer. Canada has good beer.
Canada has good Canadian beer. Though Canadians love to say American beer is garbage, it isn’t. It’s just a lighter, smoother experience. I actually really like American beer, for what it’s worth.
There is this chinese cursing. “I wish you live in interesting times.”
I am happy there is no war in my area for 70 years now. But our army is involved in foreign adventures since the jugoslawian wars. now in Afghanistan, Mali and with navy in mediterranian and Indian see. I am not so happy about all that.
I, for one, wish I lived in a world where the worst thing that happened was bad Superman movies being made.
Is the rock star in panel 3 channeling Tintin’s professor?
Tintin has a professor?
Prof Bienlein. Kind of weird nerd, totally besides the real world. maybe you know him with another Name. Not the Professor of Tintin, just one character.
I never really read Tintin, so everything about Tintin is a surprise to me.
I believe in the English translation he’s Professor Calculus.
Ooh! Tintin expert up in this house!
It might depend on the teacher. Back in 8th grade, Mr Schwenter made the Michigan History course quite interesting – and most of the interesting parts were also Canadian history: the early French explorers and missionaries, the voyageurs and the development of trade routes, General Wolfe dying at the battle of Montreal, which made Michigan and Canada English instead of French, and so on through Chief Pontiac’s war, a carefully planned series of sneak attacks, which IMHO was as close as the native Americans ever came to winning a war.
But Mr. Schwenter was soon recognized as an exceptional teacher, by a high-cost boarding school that hired him as the head master. The best math teacher quit about the same time, several excellent old ladies retired, and my little sisters went through a school system that was markedly worse than the one I experienced.
Good point. The teacher does make a big difference. This particular prof was a nice guy, but he was the most boring lecturer you could possibly imagine.
Canadian history up to about 1814 or so is pretty ace. Ever seen “Black Robe”? But I agree that after that it went boring.
As for native Americans winning wars, the Comanche won lots of those. They just got swamped by American (and, south of the border, Mexican) birth-rates.
The stuff before 1814 they never dwell on in Canadian history because it’s too interesting. They LOVE Confederation. Which, really, is the result of a drunken prime minister and a bunch of his friends partying in a Charlottetown hotel and boozing it up for a few days. But no, to them, it’s a majestic event of nation-creating. Whatevs. I stand by my claim that it’s sort of like American history if all the really interesting (and, admittedly, tragic) parts got removed.
The only part of Canadian history I know is from 2001 when I was at a NATO base in Bosnia. The Canadian’s were celebrating their independence day but handing out glasses of what they called Moose Milk. It was basically a vanilla milkshake with Canadian whisky mixed in. It was good!
Uh, I no nothing of moose milk. That must be a military thing.
THE TRUE STORY of CANADIAN INDEPENDENCE DAY
One day Dudley Do-Right approached John Bull:
Dudley (head bowed, feet shyly shuffling) “Golly Gee, Mr. Bull, I was just kinda’ wondering if – you know – you might see fit to let little old Canada leave your Empire and be on our own ?”
John Bull (throws head back and roars with laughter) “HARRRR ! Of course I’ll let you go. Why not ?”
“And in fact I would have let those Americans go just as easily, but they are such uppity snotts ! Making their obnoxious DECLARATIONS of this thing and that thing….”
“So I figured I’d teach them a lesson. And Good Riddance of those troublemakers, I say !”
“But you, Canada, you’re polite and respectful. So although I’ll miss you, you are free to leave. But remember, should your undies get too tight, good old John Bull is here to help ! HARRRR !!!”
INCONCEIVABLE
To be fair, a lot of “official” US history has been taught from stories of historical fiction, written because the actual history wasn’t a very good read (or didn’t stroke national egos enough). Time passed and no one remembered that the sources of these stories were tall tales and not actual facts, so they taught them that way in schools.
Some still are.
Most of history is apocryphal. Because apocrypha almost always make better stories.