I know I’m going to get a whole bunch of people questioning Colin’s man-type abilities here, but let me say this in his defence: until you’ve experienced this scenario, you have NO IDEA how difficult it is. It’s not impossible to manage, mind you. Just … difficult. That said, one needs to make hay while the sun shines, because there’s little making of hay after the baby arrives. Babies have a habit of bringing hay production to a grinding halt, if you know what I mean. I hope you know what I mean. Because I think my own metaphor’s starting to confuse me.
In other news, you great readers and your great votes shot Puck into the stratosphere on Top Web Comics last week, getting me to 11th place for a few days! That's, like, almost in the top ten! Pretty impressive stuff. Speaking of which...
APRIL VOTING INCENTIVE! APRIL SHOWERS BRING ... FULL FRONTAL NUDITY!!!
It's April, and that means another Puck voting incentive on TWC! This time we're going whole hog! It's all coming off, with Tracee! She's evil, she's hot, and she's getting clean! Seriously, how has this chick NOT gotten her own voting incentive yet?
I had some troubles uploading this image to TWC, but I think I've got them fixed now.
This particular voting incentive is no longer up on TWC, but you can GET IT AT THE STORE, along with all the other incentives, for a few bucks!This particular voting incentive is no longer up on TWC, but you can GET IT AT THE STORE, along with all the other incentives, for a few bucks!
In the third trimester it’s not recommended,
but it is quite easy. My wife and I call it the ‘X’ position.
The woman lies on her back, in the middle of a double
bed. Her right leg lies out straight, her left leg is
bent at the knee with foot flat on the bed just below
the right knee. The man lies perpendicular to the woman
with his head to her left, at the edge of the bed. He
places his torso under her left leg, with his right leg
under her right leg, and his left leg bent at the knee
over her right leg. The feet of the man will dangle
in mud-air off the edge of the bed to the right of the
woman. The man rests on his right side. This places
his ‘equipmwnt’ in close enough proximity to hers
with no pressure on her stomach.
As I am disabled, this is the only way that I and my
wife can enjoy ‘marital bliss’. It has the added
benefit of allowing the man and wife to sleep after
completion without separating.
I cannot stop laughing at the third panel because of Puck. The way she’s just laying there with her belly all swollen and uninviting.
Even the way she looks at Colin his beyond hilarious. It’s a means to an end for her; there’s nothing lustful in her approach nor is she trying to make it so.
We, as men, are 98% of the time are visual creatures. In these instances, the “hardware” can take on a mind of its own. No need to feign impotency. Cruel, I know but I’ve found faking the headache on these occasions only leads to ticking off your mate more.
Faking “bubble guts” is a lot more affective. God, I should be ashamed for admitting that… 😀
That Puck: what a hopeless romantic. It’s really hard to be seductive at this stage in the game. Panel three is one of my favorites of all time, I’d say. I’m glad someone else agrees!
Colin needs his man card revoked. I mean, if a man must vote for meat, he must also figure out the logistics of — with his woman at any time. And — with a pregnant woman? Not that logistically hard.
Unless he finds Puck unattractive at this point, with the big belly? Is that what he’s thinking, and only SAYS something about “logistics” so not to invoke her wrath?
I’ve heard of men who have that problem, and while no excuse when dealing with the person you love, is NOT a man card worthy problem.
You don’t have to answer that, EG. Just random musings at this point.
If a woman takes decent care of herself while pregnant she will be at least as attractive at nine months as she was at conception. And the logistics are not insurmountable.
True. But Mount Everest is also, technically speaking, not insurmountable. People HAVE surmounted it! It doesn’t make the surmounting fun or alluring, though. 😉
While large like that, a lazy d—y position (her on her elbows and knees, resting her head on her hands or a pillow) can be quite effective. Just make sure that you are considering her feelings as well as your own, Colin. It is her o—-m, not his, that can induce labour.
Not entirely true. From what I was told at 42 weeks pregnant and NOT happy about it, sperm actually contains chemicals that can soften the cervix, much like what is used to artificially induce labor.
Probably WAY more than most men want to know about the whole process, mind … and quite a few women as well.
I’ve heard lots of crazy explanations as to how this concept works. All I can report is that it DIDN’T work in my wife’s case. Maybe I just don’t got what it takes; I dunno.
Every time someone calls it a “bundle of joy”, I shudder.
Whatever babies are bundles of, there isn’t any joy in there.
Bundle of Sh–, Tears & Vomit perhaps.
Bundle of Attempted Suicide?
Yeah… that is something people without actual baby experience can’t really appreciate: they’re absolute masters at trying to kill themselves… and unfortunately one is obligated to stop them.
I really can’t argue with you here. We’re genetically programmed to feel the joy even when there’s really none there. Except you. You missed that gene.
Not exactly. Mine just got repurposed toward cats instead. I’m one of those people who will go visit a friend who has cats… so I can hang out with the cats.
And then I sit there baby-talking the cat for hours.
” that is something people without actual baby experience can’t really appreciate: they’re absolute masters at trying to kill themselves… and unfortunately one is obligated to stop them.”
Oh it’s possible. The best part is figuring out what works best for you both. 😉
Trust me. I’m not selling anything or running for office and I’ve two grown kids that were born a year apart. I might have some experience with these things.
So am I, friend. So am I. This ‘make a comic about a pregnant girl’ is about the closest thing to being pregnant as I can get. Not as painful, but it’s lasting way longer.
Because nothing gets a guy into a romantic mood like “Hey, the baby might start coming out half-way through the sex. Better hope she doesn’t have teeth yet.”
I don’t recall having any major difficulties. Of course, we engineering types are adept at coming up with creative solutions — especially when there is a good incentive.
My wife was 9 months and 3 weeks pregnant and on advise of nurse neighbor she told me were going to have sex so she could have baby delivered without C-section. It was difficult getting in position but it did the trick and next day our daughter was born.
It's April, and that means another Puck voting incentive on TWC! This time we're going whole hog! It's all coming off, with Tracee! She's evil, she's hot, and she's getting clean! Seriously, how has this chick NOT gotten her own voting incentive yet?
I had some troubles uploading this image to TWC, but I think I've got them fixed now.
This particular voting incentive is no longer up on TWC, but you can GET IT AT THE STORE, along with all the other incentives, for a few bucks!This particular voting incentive is no longer up on TWC, but you can GET IT AT THE STORE, along with all the other incentives, for a few bucks!
Heh. If I was Colin I’d feign impotency.
A dangerous thing to feign. Better to just go with a headache.
Broccoli in my wiz? What??? (talking about the incentive here)
You’re the second person to actually somehow decipher what’s in that scramble. I have no idea how you did it, but I salute you!
Colin seems to be afraid that he’ll hurt the baby by making love to Puck.
You skipped a week and didn’t even mention it.
In the third trimester it’s not recommended,
but it is quite easy. My wife and I call it the ‘X’ position.
The woman lies on her back, in the middle of a double
bed. Her right leg lies out straight, her left leg is
bent at the knee with foot flat on the bed just below
the right knee. The man lies perpendicular to the woman
with his head to her left, at the edge of the bed. He
places his torso under her left leg, with his right leg
under her right leg, and his left leg bent at the knee
over her right leg. The feet of the man will dangle
in mud-air off the edge of the bed to the right of the
woman. The man rests on his right side. This places
his ‘equipmwnt’ in close enough proximity to hers
with no pressure on her stomach.
As I am disabled, this is the only way that I and my
wife can enjoy ‘marital bliss’. It has the added
benefit of allowing the man and wife to sleep after
completion without separating.
I’m getting confused just reading this. You are, I think it must be said, far more skilled than Colin. Or me.
no man is that large
It’s not the size that really matters here. It’s more the … approach.
You’d think they could figure out d—y style. I mean, he doesn’t even have to see her big belly and the approach shouldn’t be an issue.
Well, give ’em time. Give ’em time.
I cannot stop laughing at the third panel because of Puck. The way she’s just laying there with her belly all swollen and uninviting.
Even the way she looks at Colin his beyond hilarious. It’s a means to an end for her; there’s nothing lustful in her approach nor is she trying to make it so.
We, as men, are 98% of the time are visual creatures. In these instances, the “hardware” can take on a mind of its own. No need to feign impotency. Cruel, I know but I’ve found faking the headache on these occasions only leads to ticking off your mate more.
Faking “bubble guts” is a lot more affective. God, I should be ashamed for admitting that… 😀
That Puck: what a hopeless romantic. It’s really hard to be seductive at this stage in the game. Panel three is one of my favorites of all time, I’d say. I’m glad someone else agrees!
Colin needs his man card revoked. I mean, if a man must vote for meat, he must also figure out the logistics of — with his woman at any time. And — with a pregnant woman? Not that logistically hard.
But when you’re merely a means to an end, is it not hard to really, REALLY get involved here? Enh, you’re right. Take his man card away!
Unless he finds Puck unattractive at this point, with the big belly? Is that what he’s thinking, and only SAYS something about “logistics” so not to invoke her wrath?
I’ve heard of men who have that problem, and while no excuse when dealing with the person you love, is NOT a man card worthy problem.
You don’t have to answer that, EG. Just random musings at this point.
Nah, I think Colin still finds Puck as attractive as ever. And don’t we all?
If a woman takes decent care of herself while pregnant she will be at least as attractive at nine months as she was at conception. And the logistics are not insurmountable.
True. But Mount Everest is also, technically speaking, not insurmountable. People HAVE surmounted it! It doesn’t make the surmounting fun or alluring, though. 😉
While large like that, a lazy d—y position (her on her elbows and knees, resting her head on her hands or a pillow) can be quite effective. Just make sure that you are considering her feelings as well as your own, Colin. It is her o—-m, not his, that can induce labour.
Well, that’s an issue, because I don’t think that Puck is particularly ‘in the mood’ here. Too much pressure for a guy, man! Too much pressure!
In light of what David is saying, as long as Col is willing, there are always the”alternantive means” of assisting her to O-town….
I’m sure there are. Though they likely won’t be detailed in any upcoming comics.
Not entirely true. From what I was told at 42 weeks pregnant and NOT happy about it, sperm actually contains chemicals that can soften the cervix, much like what is used to artificially induce labor.
Probably WAY more than most men want to know about the whole process, mind … and quite a few women as well.
I’ve heard lots of crazy explanations as to how this concept works. All I can report is that it DIDN’T work in my wife’s case. Maybe I just don’t got what it takes; I dunno.
Prostaglandins are supposed to help, but I don’t think it’s necessarily your deficiency if they don’t.
Also: spoons.
One could certainly attempt a moon landing. ;-P
Well, there ain’t no Sea of Tranquility here, buddy. That much I can report.
This right here.
This will have me rolling all day. 😀
Good to hear.
I think that Puck and Colin are going to be quite busy looking after their little bundle of joy when it’s born.
You think … CORRECTLY!!!
Every time someone calls it a “bundle of joy”, I shudder.
Whatever babies are bundles of, there isn’t any joy in there.
Bundle of Sh–, Tears & Vomit perhaps.
Bundle of Attempted Suicide?
Yeah… that is something people without actual baby experience can’t really appreciate: they’re absolute masters at trying to kill themselves… and unfortunately one is obligated to stop them.
I really can’t argue with you here. We’re genetically programmed to feel the joy even when there’s really none there. Except you. You missed that gene.
Not exactly. Mine just got repurposed toward cats instead. I’m one of those people who will go visit a friend who has cats… so I can hang out with the cats.
And then I sit there baby-talking the cat for hours.
” that is something people without actual baby experience can’t really appreciate: they’re absolute masters at trying to kill themselves… and unfortunately one is obligated to stop them.”
Now that’s funny !
A great comic attracts great comments.
Colin, better to argue with herself than an upset knocked up FAIRY.
Puck, better try to work on being a bit h–ny. and being a bit patient.
I think they’re doomed on both fronts.
Oh it’s possible. The best part is figuring out what works best for you both. 😉
Trust me. I’m not selling anything or running for office and I’ve two grown kids that were born a year apart. I might have some experience with these things.
You’re one of the skilled ones, then. Colin does not have the skills to win the bills. Which is obvious here.
How about a Puck vote comic featuring the great military minds of history.
Patton and Puck – together at last? I … don’t think that would be a hot seller.
Just finished reading the archive. Good stuff! Looking forward to Puck being not pregnant again.
So am I, friend. So am I. This ‘make a comic about a pregnant girl’ is about the closest thing to being pregnant as I can get. Not as painful, but it’s lasting way longer.
Where there is a will, there is a way, maybe somebody can knock on the door or wall and yell, “TRY Doggy! it won’t turn the kid into a puppy!”
I think that’s been scientifically proven, actually.
Well, since their first kid is a puppy…
Incentive image seems warped. Corrupted image file or just your sense of humor?
The latter. 😉
Riiiiight Puck.
Because nothing gets a guy into a romantic mood like “Hey, the baby might start coming out half-way through the sex. Better hope she doesn’t have teeth yet.”
No. Just … no.
I don’t recall having any major difficulties. Of course, we engineering types are adept at coming up with creative solutions — especially when there is a good incentive.
There you have it. Why engineers are the best.
Ladies, take a lesson here.
Was there ever any question that engineers were the best?
There was not.
I’m checking in from the future to claim that the statement “until you’ve experienced this scenario, you have NO IDEA how difficult it is”
is 100% accurate.
Thanks for backing me up on that one.
My wife was 9 months and 3 weeks pregnant and on advise of nurse neighbor she told me were going to have sex so she could have baby delivered without C-section. It was difficult getting in position but it did the trick and next day our daughter was born.
See? It works, I guess.