Fly, you fools! FLY!
FYI: In works of fiction, a woman’s water breaking is always the first thing to happen in labour. In movies, there’s never a slow build-up of contractions or anything. Just BAM, water breaks. This does sometimes happen (it happened with my wife’s first pregnancy), but not often. It’s hackneyed and ridiculous, but I’m going with it! Because I have no choice! The fiction police would give me a ticket if I didn’t!
July Voting Incentive NOW UP!!!
It’s July, and that means Puck’s pulling out ALL the stops by giving you a voting incentive that has everything you ever wanted! And when we say everything, we mean EVERYTHING!
CLICK HERE TO VOTE FOR PUCK!!!
And Puck’s the one who suggested ‘being spontaneous’ and leaving off the condom, when Colin originally objected it might be a good idea for him to have one on for their little mad romp…
Well, I think the innate fear of very pregnant chicks springs from the fear that perhaps one will have to assist in the delivery if there is no one else around. Even that short, brutally intense bout of responsibility is thoroughly horrifying.
After that, Puck will be saying, “Oh good. Colin, you are here. This is your daughter. What do think her name should be? Oh, by the way, [ Grabs Colin’s shirt and pulls him down to be almost nose-to-nose ] if you ever put me through that again, I will eviscerate you! Maybe just disem-ball you.”
My wife’s first pregnancy: it was eleven at night; she went into the washroom. All I heard was a splash, followed by “Oh sh#$!” and I thought “There goes my chance at a good night’s sleep.”
A friend of mine helped to deliver her friends baby in her bathroom. The pregnant lady thought she had to pee then started yelling about her water breaking. The baby was delivered before the paramedics could get there. He labor came on fast and the baby was out in less than 45 minutes.
That’s … very Hollywood. That will not happen to Puck. She’ll get to the hospital in time, but only because there’s more comic potential in a hospital.
It … varies. Depends on the amount of amniotic fluid and some other factors that vary between pregnancies. On my wife’s first pregnancy, her water broke first (like this), but it wasn’t a huge tidal wave like this. Really, it wasn’t much at all. On her SECOND pregnancy, though, the doctor actively broke her water, and that one was a tidal wave. Weird how much it can vary.
12 comics and counting until the new phase of Puck begins. At least according to what we were told a few comics ago.
I am glad that I will never have to deal with this myself, unless I get involved with a woman who is already pregnant, since, as I said before, I got my junk snipped. That, or if I befriend a woman who is in that stage of pregnancy.
Junk can get unsnipped. Or so I’ve heard. But yeah, there are some benefits to unyoking yourself from the wheel of reproduction. Not dealing with this crap is certainly one of those benefits.
Yes, a Vasectomy can be reversed. That’s how my youngest male cousin on my dad’s side was born; his dad had his reversed. But I don’t intend to get mine reversed. I like being a cool uncle more than I’d like to be a dad.
Show at my brother’s place, wind up the girls and then take off, leaving him and his wife to deal with the hyper little monsters. 🙂
“I am teaching the girls how to kick a soccer ball around, not babysitting. If the little one needs changing, well, you have a lot more practice at it.”
Your junk can spontaneously re snip itself, AND sperm have been known to make the jump between untied ends too.
Extremely rare but it does happen. Life finds a way man.
This is eerily similar to what happened during the labor of my first daughter. The only thing she would eat was spaghettioos and Mc Ribs( the breakfast lunch and diinner of champion level babies everywhere) anyway Mcribs disappeared from my Mcdonald’s and in the process of shaking the poor fry monkey my water broke. Not cool when an entire Mcdonald’s evacuates like a fire broke out. Just a bunch of people screaming “OH SH#%!!!” Hilarious long story short baby came out pretty, healthy and screaming and in that iconic moment where you stare down into their little face and finally understand the mysteries of the universe she blinked, smiled and then sh$%^ed on my chest! It was everything about being a parent summed up in a single action 🙂
Well, now we know exactly what needs to happen in this comic. That’s too beautifully ridiculous a story to pass up. I’m glad the thoroughly insane contents of this comic are mirroring someone’s life, at least. Makes me feel like I’m keeping it real.
I’d wager I’d have been the janitor who’d have had to clean up the amniotic fluid. I’ve got horror stories from doing that kind of job, with fluids and material fall less pleasant. Which I will not go into, as this isn’t the time for it.
Had a friend who worked as plant staff for a mall. He was the one who corrected me on my erroneous belief that men’s washrooms were dirty because men are slobs. “No, no, no,” he said. “Men’s washrooms are dirty because men don’t complain, and janitors know they can get away with skipping regular cleanings. Women’s washrooms are cleaned more often because women demand it, but you regularly find FAR more horrifying messes in there.” He chalked it up to the fact that many women seemed to be afraid to actually sit on the toilet, which leads to … accidents. I’m going to take his word for it.
Actually as both a woman and as someone who has done janitorial work servicing both men’s and women’s restrooms I can attest to that being correct. Men’s rooms may have issues with urine on the floors, but for the most part they do not hold a candle to the messes some women feel completely okay with leaving in a public restroom.
Men usually only deal with two things in a restroom, women deal with several depending on if they have children with them, (yes, I know that some dad’s do bathroom duty but they seem more vigilant about cleaning up after their kids.) or what time of the month it is.
All I can say is, I have never been more ashamed of being a woman than when I’ve had to clean up public bathrooms.
Still, at least someone cleans those messes up. My daughter’s only three, but even she has learned the fact that men’s washrooms are seldom cleaned and smell awful. When I’m with her in a public place and she needs to go, I offer to take her into the men’s room, but she now declines. “No, is too stinky,” she insists. “I wait.” She’s right, too.
Very true. I’ve had to clean a women’s restroom more than once a day, but unless someone does something vile in the men’s room (like the old man who somehow got turds on the sink), I’ve only had to do it before the place opened.
Truckstop restrooms are worse, because you get people who don’t shower for weeks coming and going in and out of those.
There was a woman who worked in an office who was very, very pregnant. She accidentally dropped her glass of water and a young man was helping her clean it up when their boss walked into the room.
“What is going on here?” their boss asked.
“Oh, her water broke and I’m just helping her to clean up.”
Well, since “baby sauce” is what’s needed to create a baby, and “baby juice” is what protects the baby and lubricates the birth canal, I think you made the right choice.
Luckily, so far I have avoided such terrible aspects of a job, but now that I have said that , I have probably just jinxed myself…. especially with July 4th coming up…
My wife’s water broke while on her cutting table (she was a seamstress), she finished what she was working on and then told me we needed to go to hospital after calling her doctor. She did not have any convulsions until after she arrived at hospital and saw her doctor. None of those hospital trainees getting involved.
It’s July, and that means Puck’s pulling out ALL the stops by giving you a voting incentive that has everything you ever wanted! And when we say everything, we mean EVERYTHING!
CLICK HERE TO VOTE FOR PUCK!!!
RUUN!!!
Run from the greatest terror of them all: RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!
How are those guys responsible? It is Colin’s child!
And Puck’s the one who suggested ‘being spontaneous’ and leaving off the condom, when Colin originally objected it might be a good idea for him to have one on for their little mad romp…
Colin is actually the more responsible of the two, when you get right down to it. He just doesn’t seem like it on the surface.
Well, Colin isn’t an ancient faerie known for her caprice and trickster ways. ^^
Well, I think the innate fear of very pregnant chicks springs from the fear that perhaps one will have to assist in the delivery if there is no one else around. Even that short, brutally intense bout of responsibility is thoroughly horrifying.
Well, she didn’t get her cinnamon, but she succeeded!
Which brings us to the other guaranteed way to get baby moving: acts of physical violence!
It is the delicious smell of the Cinnabon that drew forth the child!
The smell of … the boarded up storefront? I dunno. I think the violent act of physical assault had more to do with it.
Well, intense emotions can sometimes jumpstart delivery.
Now taking bets that soon enough, Puck will be screaming something on the lines of: “I take it back! Stop it! Just stay in place! AAAGHH!”
You can call them.
After that, Puck will be saying, “Oh good. Colin, you are here. This is your daughter. What do think her name should be? Oh, by the way, [ Grabs Colin’s shirt and pulls him down to be almost nose-to-nose ] if you ever put me through that again, I will eviscerate you! Maybe just disem-ball you.”
Quite possibly. You people keep writing better material than me.
“Well, I’ll be damned.” Possibly, but let’s not give up all hope, right?
I think that’s a given, really.
“Well I’ll be damned” is not what I said… Had no contractions, no signs— when it happened to me I went “FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUJUU”
My wife’s first pregnancy: it was eleven at night; she went into the washroom. All I heard was a splash, followed by “Oh sh#$!” and I thought “There goes my chance at a good night’s sleep.”
A friend of mine helped to deliver her friends baby in her bathroom. The pregnant lady thought she had to pee then started yelling about her water breaking. The baby was delivered before the paramedics could get there. He labor came on fast and the baby was out in less than 45 minutes.
That’s … very Hollywood. That will not happen to Puck. She’ll get to the hospital in time, but only because there’s more comic potential in a hospital.
I wasn’t really thinking of her pregnancy.
So is that really what it looks like when a pregnant woman’s water breaks?
It … varies. Depends on the amount of amniotic fluid and some other factors that vary between pregnancies. On my wife’s first pregnancy, her water broke first (like this), but it wasn’t a huge tidal wave like this. Really, it wasn’t much at all. On her SECOND pregnancy, though, the doctor actively broke her water, and that one was a tidal wave. Weird how much it can vary.
I’ll bet your Wife just loooves all that personal TMI going out to millions of viewers.
Once you have a child, the luxury of personal boundaries is broken forever. That’s just the way it is. Oversharing FTW.
I laugh in the face of people who ever had such personal boundaries. I’ve been oversharing since I first got on the Internet back in 1995.
“Splash,splash, I was havin’ a baby, right in the middle of the mall …” 😀
Typical mall cops; what a bunch of p—ies.
Arrrgh … I meant to write “Splish, splash …”
Damn you Auto Correct!
Bobby Darin would be proud.
I always go to mall cops in times of need. They’re a tough, hard-bitten lot.
Bitten hard by the shoplifters when they try to get away.
12 comics and counting until the new phase of Puck begins. At least according to what we were told a few comics ago.
I am glad that I will never have to deal with this myself, unless I get involved with a woman who is already pregnant, since, as I said before, I got my junk snipped. That, or if I befriend a woman who is in that stage of pregnancy.
Junk can get unsnipped. Or so I’ve heard. But yeah, there are some benefits to unyoking yourself from the wheel of reproduction. Not dealing with this crap is certainly one of those benefits.
Yes, a Vasectomy can be reversed. That’s how my youngest male cousin on my dad’s side was born; his dad had his reversed. But I don’t intend to get mine reversed. I like being a cool uncle more than I’d like to be a dad.
Cool uncle is a good role to have: all the fun with none of the barf! Well, less chance of barf.
And none of the poop, too.
Show at my brother’s place, wind up the girls and then take off, leaving him and his wife to deal with the hyper little monsters. 🙂
“I am teaching the girls how to kick a soccer ball around, not babysitting. If the little one needs changing, well, you have a lot more practice at it.”
Smart man.
Your junk can spontaneously re snip itself, AND sperm have been known to make the jump between untied ends too.
Extremely rare but it does happen. Life finds a way man.
This is eerily similar to what happened during the labor of my first daughter. The only thing she would eat was spaghettioos and Mc Ribs( the breakfast lunch and diinner of champion level babies everywhere) anyway Mcribs disappeared from my Mcdonald’s and in the process of shaking the poor fry monkey my water broke. Not cool when an entire Mcdonald’s evacuates like a fire broke out. Just a bunch of people screaming “OH SH#%!!!” Hilarious long story short baby came out pretty, healthy and screaming and in that iconic moment where you stare down into their little face and finally understand the mysteries of the universe she blinked, smiled and then sh$%^ed on my chest! It was everything about being a parent summed up in a single action 🙂
Well, now we know exactly what needs to happen in this comic. That’s too beautifully ridiculous a story to pass up. I’m glad the thoroughly insane contents of this comic are mirroring someone’s life, at least. Makes me feel like I’m keeping it real.
I’d wager I’d have been the janitor who’d have had to clean up the amniotic fluid. I’ve got horror stories from doing that kind of job, with fluids and material fall less pleasant. Which I will not go into, as this isn’t the time for it.
Had a friend who worked as plant staff for a mall. He was the one who corrected me on my erroneous belief that men’s washrooms were dirty because men are slobs. “No, no, no,” he said. “Men’s washrooms are dirty because men don’t complain, and janitors know they can get away with skipping regular cleanings. Women’s washrooms are cleaned more often because women demand it, but you regularly find FAR more horrifying messes in there.” He chalked it up to the fact that many women seemed to be afraid to actually sit on the toilet, which leads to … accidents. I’m going to take his word for it.
Actually as both a woman and as someone who has done janitorial work servicing both men’s and women’s restrooms I can attest to that being correct. Men’s rooms may have issues with urine on the floors, but for the most part they do not hold a candle to the messes some women feel completely okay with leaving in a public restroom.
Men usually only deal with two things in a restroom, women deal with several depending on if they have children with them, (yes, I know that some dad’s do bathroom duty but they seem more vigilant about cleaning up after their kids.) or what time of the month it is.
All I can say is, I have never been more ashamed of being a woman than when I’ve had to clean up public bathrooms.
Still, at least someone cleans those messes up. My daughter’s only three, but even she has learned the fact that men’s washrooms are seldom cleaned and smell awful. When I’m with her in a public place and she needs to go, I offer to take her into the men’s room, but she now declines. “No, is too stinky,” she insists. “I wait.” She’s right, too.
Very true. I’ve had to clean a women’s restroom more than once a day, but unless someone does something vile in the men’s room (like the old man who somehow got turds on the sink), I’ve only had to do it before the place opened.
Truckstop restrooms are worse, because you get people who don’t shower for weeks coming and going in and out of those.
Eeeeegha.
BABY JUICE. LOL
100% juice! Not from concentrate! Vitamin C fortified!
…. ew.
You are more likely to find vitamins E and K, rather than C, in that fluid. Maybe some A.
I knew someone would correct me on that one.
And I for one am glad someone did. Not to berate you and put you down, but rather I was genuinely curious myself and too lazy to google. 🙂
Education at its finest!
Amniotic fluid is basically baby piss.
Those last two panels are both disgusting, and funny.
I have been successful, then!
Oh my gosh, this reminds me of a joke;
There was a woman who worked in an office who was very, very pregnant. She accidentally dropped her glass of water and a young man was helping her clean it up when their boss walked into the room.
“What is going on here?” their boss asked.
“Oh, her water broke and I’m just helping her to clean up.”
That’s the kind of awesome line that you can deliver only once in a lifetime. I’m glad he took the opportunity.
It’s said that the best birth control is not having sexual relations.
Whoever said it, that’s pretty accurate.
That person must have been a painfully boring sod, seldom invited to parties, doesn’t know any good jokes, what have you.
Yep.
LOL. “Baby juice”. So that’s what it’s called.
Love how the guard plays up the YUCK factor. 😀
It was a toss-up between baby juice and baby sauce.
Well, since “baby sauce” is what’s needed to create a baby, and “baby juice” is what protects the baby and lubricates the birth canal, I think you made the right choice.
Yes, I am gross sometimes. 🙂
http://www.girlswithslingshots.com/comic/gws41/
I find this highly pertinent.
Luckily, so far I have avoided such terrible aspects of a job, but now that I have said that , I have probably just jinxed myself…. especially with July 4th coming up…
Someone’s always got it worse. That someone usually has a mop.
My stepmother is pregnant too and I want to see who has their kid first. She’s due in September but you never know x
Mmmmmm … hard to say. It’ll be a race to the finish! Mind you, Puck’s been on that race for a million, zillion years, so…
Ooh, but my stepmother’s sister just had an emergency C-section, and now I have a little cousin! Called Bailey.
The more babies, the merrier! (Well, actually, the more babies, the more tears. Babies are dangerous.)
Baby juice….I’m fairly certain there’s a joke to be made here. I’m just too disgusted to make it. What was YOUR excuse?
I don’t have one.
My wife’s water broke while on her cutting table (she was a seamstress), she finished what she was working on and then told me we needed to go to hospital after calling her doctor. She did not have any convulsions until after she arrived at hospital and saw her doctor. None of those hospital trainees getting involved.